In summer, I try to read good books I've been waiting to read, do something new that I've never tried before, grow in a way where I know I'm immature.
And, hopefully, by summer's end, I'll see a little growth, feel a little difference, seem a little less...inadequate.
But, each year, I wind up wanting.
"The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want...(Psalm 23:1)"
I know it's true. I just don't feel it. Maybe I'm focusing on the wrong things. I'm pursuing something that will not fulfill.
That's what I need. That's truly what I want.
I am thinking I'll find fulfillment in feeling "adequate." But, I am a broken vessel. The well is deep, and I have nothing to draw water with to fill me up. I need Someone to fill me, to fulfill my deepest desires.
Little reminders here and there, turn my thoughts toward heaven. The place where God's glory dwells.
This is not my home. I was meant for eternity.
That is why I am wanting. I want Him. More of Him.
And, the more time spent including Him in my daily tasks, spending time alone with Him, seeking His face, I am fulfilled.
I experience true fulfillment. This is my destiny.
And, one day, all my seeking will come to true fulfillment.
In the haven of heaven.
The perfect paradise.
The place where summer never ends.
And, the Fulfiller of my wildest dreams and aspirations is there with open arms to welcome me home.
Oh, for that day!